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Shrubby
A political rock opera parody of "Tommy" by The Who
Guest song parodies by Mr. Annoyed

OVERTURE

Poppy Walker
Wanted to win.
His firstborn child
Will vindicate him.

Some votes are missing
With a number of chads -
Don't expect
To see them again.


IT'S A COUP (2000)
(Sung to the tune of "It's a Boy!")

Man on the Street:
It's a coup, the election, it's a coup.
It's a coup, the election, it's a coup.

The Supreme Court:
He Won! He Won! He Won!


WE DIDN'T HEAR THEM (9-11)
(Sung to the tune of "You Didn't Hear It - 1921")

Cheney:

Got a hunch two-thousand one
Is going to be a good year.
Especially if you and me
See it in together.

Shrubby:

You think 2001 is going to be a good year?
(I'm glad that Kenny thought to stick
The folders in the shredder.)
I had no reason to be over optimistic,
But somehow when you sneered
I could brave bad weather.

Public asks about terrorists attacks:

What about reports?
What about reports?
What about reports?
You should have known!

Shrubby and Cheney:

We didn't hear them
We didn't see them.
You won't say nothing to no one
Ever in your life.
We never heard them
Oh how absurd it
All seems without any proof.
You didn't hear them
You didn't see them
You never heard it not a word of them.
You won't say nothing to no one
Never tell a soul
What you know is the Truth.


AMAZING SHRUBBY (FLASHBACK)
(Sung to the tune of "Amazing Journey" by The Who)

Rich little frat boy
He's in a quiet vibration land
Strange as it seems his drug-induced dreams
Ain't quite so bad.

Twenty-one
The campus clown of DKE.
Loving life and becoming wise
In simplicity.

Chivas will surely take the mind
Where minds can't usually go.
Come on his amazing daydream
And learn all Shrubby knows.

A vague haze of delerium
Creeps up on him.
All at once a cheerleader we suddenly see
That struts with a silver sparked
Glimmering spoon,
A patrician cowboy grinning
Like a baboon.

Nothing to say and nothing to hear
And nothing to see.
All in all, a profile of mediocrity.

Chivas will surely take the mind
Where minds can't usually go.
Come on the amazing journey
And learn all Shrubby knows.

His eyes are the eyes that
Transmit all they know.
Squinting blank glassy-eyed glances to show
That he is your leader
And he is your guide -
That the amazing Shrub is enjoying the ride.


SMIRKS [Sparks]

[Instrumental]


THE HAWK (CONDI RICE)
[The Hawker (Eyesight to the Blind)]

Shrubby:

You talk about your woman
I wish you could see mine,
You talk about your woman
I wish you could see mine,
Every time she starts to talkin'
White House staffers tow the line.

You know that Condi's got the magic
I can tell by the way she walks.
You know that Condi's got the magic
I can tell by the way she walks.
Everytime she starts to shakin'
She titillates the hawks.

She's got the power of Shiva, death and fear
She's got the power of Shiva, death and fear
Just a word from her lips
And the Brass will kiss her rear.


CHRISTIANS [Christmas]

Religious commentator:

Did you ever hear the ravings of the Christians
Who got Shrub appointed?
Craving right-wing Christian leaders,
They all think that Poppy's son's anointed.
He believes in God and Jesus Christ,
Including heaven's generosity.
Petting all the sheep
To see what voters take to his
Religiosity.

But Shrubby doesn't know what faith inspires.
Doesn't know what Jesus taught or what he requires.
How can we be saved
From this infernal knave?

Surrounded by his thugs he stands so stupidly,
And unconcerned for anything.
Playing drugstore cowboy
Sniffs his nose and smirks and
And flips the bird at everything.
I believe in faith
But how can nuts who've never seen
Light be enlightened.
Only if he's gone
Will our country's future level ever heighten.

And Shrubby doesn't know what faith inspires.
Doesn't know what Jesus taught or what he requires.
How can we be saved
From this infernal knave?

A Methodist bishop (from Shrub's own denomination):

Shrubby can you hear me?
Shrubby can you hear me?
Shrubby can you hear me?

Religious leaders:

How can we be saved?

Shrubby:

See me, hear me
Love me, fear me.
See me, hear me
Love me, fear me!

Pope:

Shrubby can you hear me?
Shrubby can you hear me?
Shrubby can you hear me?

People:

How can we be saved?

V.P. CHENEY [Cousin Kevin]

Dick Cheney, the puppet master:

Were on our own Dubya,
All alone Dubya.
Let's think of a game to play
Now the cameras have all gone away.
You won't be much fun
Being still, deaf and dumb
But I've no one to play with today.
D'you know how to wreck and destroy?
Do you think they will see through our ploy.
But tied to these strings you can't do anything.
There's a lot I can do with a toy.

How would they feel if we flattened Iraq,
Killed all the people and started to laugh?
What would they do if we robbed SSI?
They'd work for small change
Till the day that they died!

I'm the school bully!
The classroom cheat.
The nastiest V.P.
You ever could meet.
I'll kick your dear old mother
Right out on the street...
 

Were on our own Dubya,
All alone Dubya.
Let's think of a game to play
Now the cameras have all gone away.
You won't be much fun
Being still, deaf and dumb
But I've no one to play with today.
D'you know how to wreck and destroy?
Do you think they will see through our ploy?
But tied to these strings you can't do anything.
There's a lot I can do with a toy.

Maybe some jack-booted soldiers well-armed
Would change their expression to one of alarm.
We'll knock down protesters and give them a scare,
Dividing the people through hatred and fear.

I'm the school bully!
The classroom cheat.
The nastiest V.P.
You ever could meet.
I'll cut jobs in the winter
And turn off the heat...



THE TOXIC QUEEN [The Acid Queen]

Christine Whitman to Businessmen:

If your net ain't all it should be now
This girl will set it straight.
I'll show you what it could be now -
Let's deregulate!
I'm Ms. Christine - the toxic Queen.
Pay before we start.
I'm Christine - I guarantee
We'll tear the soil apart.

Give us a room and close the door
Leave us for a while.
The law won't be the law no more
Codes, but very mild.
I'm Ms. Christine - the toxic queen.
Pay before we start.
I'm Christine - I guarantee
We'll tear the soil apart.

Gather your wits and hold on fast,
Their jaws will drop in shock.
See what the Business Queen will do -
I'm turnin' back the clock!

My work is done, now look at it.
The wilderness won't survive.
Tree-huggers shake.  Their fingers clutch.
Watch their bodies writhe!
I'm Ms. Christine - the toxic queen.
Pay before we start.
I'm Ms. Christine - I guarantee
I'm not a bleeding heart.



EXPENDITURE [Underture]

[Instrumental]



DO YOU THINK IT'S ALRIGHT [Do You Think It's Alright!]

Democrat:

Do you think it's alright,
To vote for Homeland Security?
Do you think it's alright;
Those jokers kinda' scare me - the Right!
D'you think it's alright?

Democrat:

I think it's alright, yes I think it's alright.



MEDDLE ABOUT [Fiddle About]

John Ashcroft:

I'm that wicked Arch-Attorney
The fanatic from Missouri
I will meddle about
Meddle about
Meddle about!

Your leaders left me here to mind you
Now I'm doing what I want to
Meddling about
Meddling about
Meddle about!

Down with your freedoms
Up with surveillance!
Meddle about
Meddle about
Meddle about!

You won't shout as I meddle about
Meddle about
Meddle about
Meddle about!
Meddle, Meddle, meddle.


DISMAL LEADER
(Sung to the tune of "Pinball Wizard" by The Who)

Man on the street:

Ever since I was a young boy,
I must have seen them all.
From Nixon down to Reagan
They nailed us to the wall.
But I ain't seen nothing like him
In any used bathroom stall...
That rich, dumb, and brash dude
Sure is a mean sleaze ball!

He smirks like a primate,
Becomes part of the machine.
Feeling for his prompters
Always looking clean.
He rules by intuition,
Thinks he's above the law.
That rich, dumb, and brash dude
Sure is a mean sleaze ball!

He's a dismal leader
There has got to be some hope.
A dismal leader
Will hang on his own rope.

Citizen 2:

How do you think he makes it?

Man on the street:

I don't know!

Citizen 3:

What makes him immune?

Man on the street:

He fakes us with distractions.
(Can't hear what spinners won't tell).
He's into "librul" bashin' -
Casts his magic spell.
Always has a decoy,
Never seen him fall...
That rich, dumb, and brash dude
Sure is a mean sleaze ball.

I thought we were
A country with no king.
But we just handed
That pinhead everything.

Even in my favorite party
They're effete at best.
Their concessions lead him on
And he just takes the rest.
He's just flips the middle finger
Laughing at us all...
That rich, dumb, and brash dude
Sure is a mean sleaze ball!!!!!



THERE'S A DOCUMENT FOUND [There's a Doctor I've Found]

Unnamed Administration official:

There's a plan I've got with a document forged!
There's a document found to start the war!
A document found to start the war!

There's a plan I've got to incite suspicion,
A plagiarized joke, a study in fiction.
Let's study in fiction!



TONE DOWN THE FUROR, GEORGE [Go to the Mirror, Boy]

Diplomat at the U.N.:

Bush seems to be completely unreceptive.
I bet you that he has no sense at all.
He rambles but his thoughts are disconnected.
He hears but does not answer to our call.

Shrubby:

See me, hear me, love me, fear me.
See me, hear me, love me, fear me.

Another Diplomat:

There is no chance, no untried consultation.
All hope lies with his own citizens.
Imagine though the shock of isolation
When all turn their backs on the Americans.

Shrubby:

See me, hear me, love me, fear me.
See me, hear me, love me, fear me.

Another Diplomat:

His mind can't hear,
Although we see his lips speak
Like a puppet made up from a sock.
No appeal can give the kind of motivation,
Needed to remove his inner block.

Europeans:

Tone down the furor, George!
Tone down the furor, George!

Another Diplomat:

I often wonder what he is feeling.
Has he ever heard a word we've said?
Look at him at the lectern dreaming
What is happening in his head?

Shrubby muses about Wolfowitz:

Listening to you,
I feel elation.
Gazing at you,
I get the lead.
Following you,
I trounce the nations.
I get excitement at your feet.

Right beside you,
I dupe the millions.
Through you,
I have the glory.
From you,
I form opinions.
From you,
I spin the story.

World leaders:

What is happening in his head
Ooooh we wish we knew, we wish we knew.



SHRUBBY CAN YOU HEAR US? [Tommy Can You Hear Me?]

World opinion:

Shrubby can you hear us?
Do you even care to?
 

Shrubby can you spare us?
Can't you see we fear you.

Ooo Shrubby
Shrubby



SHOCK AND TERROR [Smash the Mirror]

Shrubby to Saddam:

You don't answer my call
With even a nod or a twitch
And you think that you have protection!
You don't seem to mind me
But I think you can see the end.
How does my bluster affect you?

Can you hear me
Or do I surmise?
That you fear me can you feel my temper
RISE.

Do you hear or fear me?
Should I bomb your country?
Do you hear or fear me?
Should I bomb your country? BOOM!



SPINSATION [Sensation]

Karl Rove:

We overwhelm the mainstream media,
Make your face turn black and blue!
Handlers break the latest stories,
News enhanced when we are through.

You'll hear us spinning,
A new position
From afar you'll see us
We're a sensation.

They worship us and all we touch -
Dittoheads are in a trance.
Centrist leaders wet their trousers.
Our warm momentum throws their stance.

You'll hear us spinning
A new position
From afar you'll see us
We're a sensation.

Soon you'll see us can't you feel us
We're spinning...
See our singers dancing we got the answer
We're spinning...
We're a sensation.

We leave a trail of stupid people
Mesmerized to trust the Right,
The chumps we touch are now disciples
Love as One We Are the Light...


MIRACLE CURE (FOR THE ECONOMY) [Miracle Cure]

Newsboy:

Extra! Extra!
Read all about it.
Our Fearless Leader with a miracle cure!
Extra Extra read all about it
EXTRA!

Shelly Malkin (somewhat inspired by the Right-wing poster girl
Michelle Malkin) [Sally Simpson]

Outside the house Mr. Malkin announced
That Shelly couldn't go to the meeting.
He went on cleaning his big John Deere
And she ran inside weeping.
She got to her room and tears splashed the picture
Of the Oil Messiah.
She picked up a frame of her husbands face
And threw it on the fire!

She knew from the start
Deep down in her heart
That she and Shrubby were worlds apart,
But her husband said never mind your part...
Is to be what you'll be.

The theme of the lecture was "Recovery:
The Shrub Will Find A Way,"
So Shelly decided to ignore her spouse,
And sneak out anyway!
She spent all afternoon getting ready,
And decided she'd try to touch Shrub,
Maybe he'd see that she was free
And talk to her this Sunday.

She knew from the start
Deep down in her heart
That she and Shrubby were worlds apart,
But her husband said never mind your part...
Is to be what you'll be.

She arrived at six and the place was swinging
To country music by nine.
Wonk after wonk appeared on the stage
And Shelly just sat there crying.
She bit her nails looking pretty as a picture
Right in the very front row
And then a wingut wearing a blazer with a badge
Ran on and said 'here we go!'

The crowd went crazy
As Shrubby hit the stage!
Little Shelly got lost as the police bossed
The crowd back in a rage!

But soon the atmosphere was cooler
As Shrubby gave a lesson.
Shelly just had to let him know she loved him
And leapt up on the rostrum!
She ran cross stage to the spotlit figure
And kissed him on the face
Shrubby whirled around as a uniformed goon,
Threw her of the stage.

She knew from the start
Deep down in her heart
That she and Shrubby were worlds apart,
But her husband said never mind your part...
Is to be what you'll be.

Her rump hit a chair and blood trickled forth,
Running down her rear,
Shrubby carried on rambling
And his twang filled Shelly's ear.
She caught his eye she had to try
But he couldn't see through the lights.
Her butt was gashed and the ambulance men
Had to carry her out that night.

The crowd went crazy
As Shrubby left them there!
Little Shelly was lost for the price of a touch
And a gash across her rear! OOoooh.

Sixteen stitches put her right and her spouse said
"Don't say I didn't tell ya'.
Shrubby won't dally with a dark-skinned woman
That looks like she's from Asia."
Shrubby always talks about the day
The disciples went berzerk!
Shelly still carries a mark on her buns
To remind her of his smirk.

She knew from the start
Deep down in her heart
That she and Shrubby were worlds apart,
But her husband said never mind your part...
Is to be what you'll be.



TAX FREE [I'm Free]

Shrubby:

Tax-free, tax free,
And freedom makes a plutocracy,
Tax free, tax free,
And I'm waiting for you to follow me.

If I told you what it takes
To get us turned around,
You'd laugh and say 'we know that "voodoo"'
Though you've been screwed many times before
We'll try to do it even more -
No one has the guts to stop the doo-doo!

Tax free, tax free
And freedom makes a plutocracy
Tax free, tax free
And I'm waiting for you to follow me.

Witless Republicans voters:

How can we follow?
How can we follow?



WELCOME TO THE WHITE HOUSE [Welcome]

Shrubby:

In the White House
Be one of the comfortable people,
Cozily right-wing
We're drinking all night
Never working.

Tycoon come in!
And you banker,
Logger and miner welcome
And you arms maker!

Come to this house!
Into this house.

Come to this house
Be one of us.
Make this your house
Be one of us.

You can help
Collect some more in.
Young and old cronies
Lets get them all in!

Come to this house!
Into this house.

Ask along that man who's making a donation.
Cut benefits for veterans
And for education,
Kiss up to drug companies
Who milk the money from patients,
Everyone go home and hire their relations!

Come to this house
Be one of the comfortable people,
Cozily right-wing,
Drinking all night never working.

Staffer:

Excuse me, sir.
There's more at the door.
There's more at the door.
There's more.

Shrubby:

We need more pork
From our connections
A staggering budget
Spare no expense now

Come to this house
Be one of us
Come into this house
Be one of us

Come to this house
Into this house

Welcome



SHRUBBY'S GOVERNMENT PLAN (Tommy's Holiday Camp)

John Ashcroft:

Good morning voters!

I'm Attorney Johnny
and I'll welcome you to Shrubby's government plan!
The plan with the difference
Nevermind the weather
When you vote for Shrubby
The government's forever!  haha!

"Suckers!"

WE'RE NOT GONNA TAKE HIM (2004) [We're Not Gonna Take It]

Shrubby:

Hello, citizens,
I guess you all know why we're here.
My name is Dubya
And I became the king this year

If you want to live in peace,
You've got to be a hawk,
So put in your earplugs
Put on your eyeshades
You know where to put the caulk.

Hey you Democrats, so sorry!
You bit the dust.
Hey you loving Mother Nature!
This land's for us!
Hey hung up old Mr. Labor,
Don't try to gain my trust!
'Cause I ain't gonna' honor you any of those ways
Although you think I must.

Intelligent, educated voters:

We're not gonna take it
We're not gonna take it
We're not gonna take it
We're not gonna take it

We're not gonna take it
Never did and never will
We're not gonna take it
Gonna break it, gonna shake it,
Let's forget it better still

Shrubby:

Now you can't hear truth,
Your ears are truly sealed.
You can't speak either,
 Coz your mouth is filled.
You can't see nothing,
And Fox News completes the scene.
Here comes Mr. Ari to introduce
The White House spin machine!

The sensible ones:

We're not gonna take it
We're not gonna take it
We're not gonna take it
We're not gonna take it

We're not gonna take it
Never did and never will
Don't want no corruption
And as far as we can tell
We ain't gonna take you
Never did and never will
We're not gonna take you
We forsake you
Gonna rape you
Let's impeach you better still.

Shrubby to angry, restless crowd (ready to beat him over the head
with those suspicious computerized voting boxes):

See me.
Hear me.
Love me.
Fear me.

Shrubby to campaign handlers:

Listening to you,
I get direction.
Gazing at you,
I get the lead.
Following you,
I rig elections.
I get excitement at your feet.

Right beside you,
I dupe the millions.
Through you,
I have the glory.
From you,
I form opinions.
Through you,
I spin the story.



Other song parodies by Mr. Annoyed
More George W. Bush song parodies from The Dubya Song Book!


Copyright © 2003 by Mr. Annoyed
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